Wednesday, September 5, 2007

FICA SCORE KILLA

THE ROOMMATE CREDIT KILLER ALMOST STRIKES AGAIN TODAY.

TODAY, WHILE WORKING FROM HOME, MY ROOMMATE COMES BACK TO THE HOUSE FROM SCHOOL. HE STARTED PACKING A BAG SO I ASKED HIM WHERE HE WAS HEADED. HE AND A FRIEND WERE GOING TO ATLANTIC CITY TO PLAY IN A POKER TOURNAMENT.

"COOL, MAYBE I'LL MEET YOU DOWN THERE LATER"

I JUMPED INTO THE SHOWER BECAUSE I HAD AN APPOINTMENT. WHILE SOAPING UP I HEAR MY ROOMMATE YELL, "YO, I NEED TO ASK YOU FOR A HUGE FAVOR." I SIGHED HEAVILY KNOWING THAT I WOULDN'T LIKE THE REQUEST. IT WAS EITHER THAT HE NEEDED A RIDE SOMEWHERE OR HE NEEDED MONEY.

"WHAT'S THAT?"

"I NEED TO BORROW LIKE TWO HUNDRED DOLLARS FOR TONIGHT"

A GRUNT AND ANOTHER SIGH CAME OUT OF ME. "WHY?"

" BECAUSE i JUST CHECKED MY ACCOUNT AND I ONLY HAVE 30 DOLLARS IN THERE."

I IMMEDIATELY LOST MY SHIT, NOT BECAUSE HE NEEDED MONEY BUT BECAUSE LAST MONTH HE F'D MY CREDIT BECAUSE HIS CHECK BOUNCED FOR THE MORTGAGE AND I HAD JUST FED-EX'D SEPTEMBERS PAYMENT YESTERDAY.

"DUDE, FIRST OFF, ITS NOT MY JOB TO BAIL YOU OUT, SECOND, WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING TO HAPPEN WITH THE MORTGAGE PAYMENTS I JUST SENT IN?

"I CHECKED, THEY ALREADY WITHDREW IT."

"WELL, THAT'S CURIOUS CONSIDERING I JUST SENT IT YESTERDAY AFTERNOON. WHY ARE YOU LYING, YOUR GOING TO FUCK MY CREDIT UP FOR GOOD AND I'M GOING TO KILL YOU.

HE SAID "SHIT" AND THEN I HEARD THE FRONT DOOR TO THE HOUSE SHUT. i REALLY HOPE HE IS GOING TO RESOLVE THIS TODAY.

2 comments:

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