Tuesday, April 22, 2008


This is unbelievable. This story should be a NYTimes Best Seller in itself.

So the house needed a brand new sewer line which is not a cheap undertaking. The sinks in the house were blocked up for almost a month and it smelled so bad that my friends came in the house, started cracking up and then ran out.

Finally, the plumbers came out on a nice sunny day and started digging two 11 foot holes, one in the front patio and one out at street level. Digging those holes was not an easy feat. It took them most of the day.

At around 1:30 I came home from an appointment, set my lap top up outside where they were doing work and started doing some work while watching the plumbers progress. I touched some type of sludge on the outside table so I went back inside to the kitchen to wash off what could have been sewer line slime off of my hand. Right as I turned the sink on and started washing one of the plumbers came in and said, "excuse me, can you please try to limit the water use while the work is being done." I said, sure, sorry, but was thinking, wow, water must really leave the house to the sewer quickly. I finished drying my hands and walked back out to the front door but heard water running upstairs. I sat and listened and it didnt shut off. It sounded as if a toilet was left running. I went upstairs to check and realized that my roommates bedroom door was closed. Its never closed unless he is home and he is rarely home during the day. I called out his name and he responded "Yeah?" So he was home.

"did you use the toilet?"

"Yeah?" he responded"

"first of all, you left the handle up and second, (I started yelling) "Do you not remember that you just paid close to 2 grand to have plumbers here all day?"

He responded, "Oh shit!, I took a crap"

I said " Are you a fucking retard? How the fuck are you so stupid"

Long story short, I knew the water from the kitchen sink couldnt have made it out of the house that quickly, and no wonder the plumber seemed so pissed. They were in the 11 foot deep holes at the same time my roommate shit. He shit on the plumbers. What an idiot.


Angela said...

Okay, you sucked me in. I started from this point and ended up reading my way backwards, you're one entertaining writer. Holy god, this is funny. Its like I was there, but not, which I'm very thankful for. I currently JUST decided to get a roommate for the first time ever (I'm 30) because I bought a house. Oh please, PLEASE don't let this happen to me!! I'd rather live vicariously through you!

The Good Roommate said...

Hey Angela,

Lets hope not. There is no way you could end up in a situation quite as bad as mine, I dont think anybody could because I am convinced that he is the devil in bad roommate form.

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